Wednesday, 15 October 2014



Now look... I am not really a 'moral police' of sorts. But I am a tad conservative and that may be dubbed as nothing but some kind of regressive attitude. I don't really like men wearing pink trousers. 

Ah! I can see that you have begun to think that I am indeed a 'dress code sleuth' trying to impose my view on others only because I 'won't look good in pink trousers'. Not really, bro! I simply think that men need to leave certain things --- like the pink colour --- to wonderful women of the world and not appropriate each and everything that comes their way. The nearest a man can come to pink is when he gets the pink slip, or describes himself to be 'in the pink' of health or whatever. 

But shouldn't men have colours in their life? I mean, it's not about being a 'colourful' personality, but literally dressed in multiple hues to be described as a 'metrosexual' animal on the prowl... Isn't that a 'cool' way? Sorry to break it, but for someone as old-fashioned as I am, bright-coloured trousers cannot be really a sign of being 'cool', but being crass. The kind of men I often see roaming around on the streets of New Delhi. 

So the other day I had to deal with one such crass guy --- a man in his early twenties, and in pink trousers, who was making silly noises as I was trying to relieve myself at the wash room of a McDonald's outlet in Connaught Place. 

"What uncle... why are you taking so much time?" the pink trouser asked me. I got pretty offended. No one asks such uncouth question to anyone, especially at critical moments like that one. But I chose not to reply and tried to do what I needed to do.

"Uncle..." he said again... "I can't control myself any more... what do I do?" he said. "Do I pee on you?" he said and nudged me.

"Go to hell..." I replied. "And then do what you want to do. You don't even know the basics... indecent fellow," I shot back now. 

He got furious. He began hurling abuses at me in his own language. I now looked at the fellow. He looked like a man with lot of physical strength. A macho man, you can say.   

Honestly, I was not surprised. I believe men in pink trousers have no sense of sobriety. No apologies for being blunt about that. And I don't think they will ever become a sober lot. And I don't expect 'macho' men to be sober either. But what did surprise me was the contradiction of a 'macho' man and the feminine pink trouser. What's the attraction of this colour even among men who are better at showing off their brawn than being polite as any good lady would be... Even at the face of abuses, I couldn't stop wondering about that. 

"Why are you wearing pink trousers?" I had to ask the fellow.
He stopped shouting and looked at me with a question on his face. 
"What do you mean?" he asked. 
"Why are you wearing pink trousers?" I asked again. 
For a while he didn't know how to react. And then he hurriedly left. 

He didn't tell me. So I don't have a first-hand reason that supports pink trousers. Perhaps a brainstorming with fashion designers and psychologists would help. But then, why bother so much about pink trousers! I should rather stay away from any man who wears pink trousers or yellow trousers or green trousers or red trousers. That will be good enough for the time being. Till you can convince me that there is nothing wrong in such colourful choices.